Your Self is experienced in the healthiest, most integrated way as an independent and autonomous being; actions and awareness are based on living experience, not contaminated by pathological motivation.* See also Natural Sense of Self.

*Not so much meant in a spiritual sense but more of a reference to the whole person you really are.

Real Self refers to the purest version of a person’s potential and manifestation as a human being, which develops when childhood natural developmental processes are supported in a healthy way – or which emerges upon Recovery from the unhealthy substitute.


Real Self is the purest, healthiest experience of who we are as a real, autonomous human being. A Real Self is a Self which is integrated, and not damaged. It is the object of true Self-care.



In this method, the term Real Self is the self which is not experienced by people whose childhood situation didn’t allow them to develop a sense of it, leading them to develop compensating behaviors.


Real Self is also used to refer to the Self which is experienced by people whose childhood is normal and healthy in certain specific ways described at length in this Method.


Real Self is also the Self which is experienced when people who have not been in the position to develop a Sense of Self during childhood heal themselves. After healing, there is no longer any ‘second party’ needed in order for them to have a (sort of) self-experience.


Experiencing a Real/Authentic Self needs to be understood as contrasting to the experience of a Substitute Sense of Self. Every single person has this real Self. The difference lies in the fact whether it is experienced or not. It is sensed by those who have a Natural SoS or a Restored SoS. It is not sensed by someone who has a Lack of SoS and relies on a Substitute SoS.


Note: When referring to the Real/Authentic Self this Method writes the word Self with a cap: when referring to the artificial self that is not the case.



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