If you understood what motivates you how might life be different?

In light of the recent attacks in Paris, France (November 13th) and San Bernardino, California (December 2nd) Healthy Sense of Self jumped on the bandwagon for a “hand over your weapons and contribute in that way to world peace” – policy.

As a result of the blog that appeared on Saturday, November 14^th 2015, I got into conversations with people who are advocates for gun ownership. Their insights made me think and have made me more careful with making global statements, however, peace-loving and well-meant they may be. These weapon owners were also completely convinced that there should be much better control on who can get their hands on weapons and the reasons why. But, things are never that unambiguous.

If you live in a country where it can take hours before the police respond to your cry for help and where all you love and cherish is in constant danger of being robbed, raped, or murdered, you do need a weapon to defend yourself. It is not right to over-generalize, and I was guilty of that myself, and made statements that come from my own, limited perspective on the situation. That doesn’t mean that you cannot be a voice for disarmament. These voices are necessary and help create a balance that in the long run, can tip the scales in our favour.  But always with respect and understanding for people who live under different circumstances and therefore have their own opinion on those matters.

That was point one.

Point two is that our Institute has to stay focussed on the how and why people come to these horrendous actions. What motivates them? Let the rest of the world figure out what needs to be done with filtering and screening people who show up at the gun store. Healthy Sense of Self wants to call attention to the why people, who once were innocent little babies, come to kill other people, who are grown up innocent little babies themselves, to play the boss or to be heard.

Many people grow up in less than ideal circumstances.

Compared to growing up in a really rough situation, “being heard and seen” by your own parents as the person that you really are, is a luxury problem. Mind you, I’m not saying “unimportant” or “non-existent.”  People in poor or otherwise limited conditions have to try and overcome insurmountable problems before they can experience some sense of safety. Probably addressing more logistical problems such as housing, schooling, a job, takes priority for these fellow men.

Parallel to that it is important, wherever possible, to make sure that every human being, regardless of circumstance, receives the right to be him/herself. It is important that this person is able to do that; that he/she knows what it means and knows how to manage that, this being your self. To recognize and experience your self in a natural way is something you first receive from your parents. If that process fails, the chances increase that that person, out of emotional distress, attaches him/herself to the ideology of a more or less controversial group, with all the potentially negative consequences thereof.

Only when a human being can experience being him/her self in a natural way to the full extent, will the aggressions stop. Then it’s possible to come to the realization we’re all in the same boat: life is short and everybody has problems that need solving. The best we can do is to find and keep balance within our self, managing our self. Once we achieve that we will have the space to assist others in their problem matters.

Healthy Sense of Self  focuses on helping people finding and keeping that inner balance.